It suddenly hit me when I burnt my sandwich today. I get bored to cook these days.
There is always some food in the fridge to save the day when you're at home. Not when you're by yourself. No, I don't usually burn food nor am I bad cook. As a matter of fact, I cook really really well, but when I have started losing the motivation to cook, that tells me something's wrong.
I can make the best varieties of meat, pav bhaji, and palak paneer. Hell, I even make my own paneer by spoiling milk. That's the extent I can go to. I can do the big stuff right, it's usually the little things I can't get right or need an assistant like making tea or peeling boiled eggs. I will fry my eggs sunny side up, not because I like the taste of raw yolks but only because I can't flip them without making a mess!
Well any way, it's just the food that makes me miss home. Man, it's been a while since I have seen everyone.
My family sent me stuff for Diwali. Made me want to yell ," I LOVE YOU , AAI!". I did not. I said a very formal thank you instead. It's very stupid, I realize. I don't remember telling any body ever that I loved them , not my mother, my brother ,my father or the other people I like and love. I some how get embarrassed to say all such. Makes me feel corny when I want to say it. So I avoid the situation. I shall be less silly someday and say it to everybody I like and the very minute I do.
I can now tell when I will have good days and bad days. Bad days start with bad music or endless talking of RJs on radio, no matter how much you switch stations, me parking my car slanted in the parking space, rain and my people not turning up to work. It will continue till the end of the night when the ice formed on the windshield. Then my radio's chord, which I have to use at work gets entangled somewhere. I wanna make a dash to my bed and then I realize I have left my headlights on and so I go back to switch them off and then the chord gets entangled again. Such is a bad day.
I am not writing to crib. Just saying on bad days, it goes so bad, one after other I begin to see the funny side of it after some time. I just give up resisting the bad day. It's a lot easier then. I tell myself it's not the end of the world, the sun will be up again tomorrow and so will I.
Also, I thought, I should mention this out of the blue. I had to stop my car on my way back from Walmart in the middle of the road because there were 4 horses in the middle of the road. Not on the sidewalk, like in the middle middle. So much talk about stray cattle on the roads in India. At least, our cows have traffic sense and walk on the side of the road and maintain lane discipline.
There are times, I take the most indirect approach ever. I got the word "moon" while playing pictionary. The easiest word ever, right? I could have drawn a crescent and a star. What do you think I drew? I drew the sun first, then drew a clock showing 8:00 clock to imply night and then my friend thankfully guessed it right. Hey, I have drawn words like "hypnotize" and phrases like "playing the second fiddle". Like I said, I can do the big stuff right, it's the small stuff that I mess up.
So now, I shall sleep. Sunny side down!