Egg and Me

Sharing:
The bed: He sleeps diagonally.
The computer: "I want it in 10 mins"
"You will get it only for 10 mins"
"No"
"I am not getting up from here then."

Family Talk:
Mother: Who has taken the
Either of us: I think he ate it!


Brotherly Love:
//Recognising my number from the caller ID//
Egg: Kay aahe (What is it?)
Me: It is nice to say a Hello/Hi when you answer the phone.
Egg: Hmm. Hello.Hi. Kaay aahe?
Me: Tell Aai I am having dinner outside.
Egg: Why?
Me: Because. I am having it with my friends.
Egg: Where?
Me: Just tell her.
Egg: Too much of outside food you eat haan. Not good.
Me: Don't act too smart.
Egg: Get vada pav for dinner tomorrow?


Helping Each Other Out:
On a cold winter morning
Me: Wake up..its 6.17 don't you have to go to college?
The Egg : Moan
Me: Chal , uth naa
Egg: Groggy Grumble
I switch on all the possible lights.
Me: 6.20 OK!
Egg: Holiddaayy naaaaaa!
Me: O! Ubck.


Trust:
He flung a ball at me while I was watching tv and yelled "EAT". The super cool being that I am, I catch the ball while my eyes are still fixed on the thing going on the tv. Without asking him what it was or even looking at it, i put it into my mouth. It turned out to be a Ferrero Rocher. Such a cool.

And Happily living ever after:
We don't talk much. We were watching tv. He poked my side and as a reflex I whacked him at the back of his head. No words spoken before or after. We continued to watched tv.

Incoherent. Banda and me on our way back home. Easterlies. The road is quite nice, irrespective of rain, dust, wind, heat, whatever the weather is. It gets you thinking while you are driving. Nothing could be seen from the windshield. Both cribbing about our own issues. Champion cribbers, us. Sometimes talking at the same time together. Not even listening to what the other person is saying. And there were times we weren' speaking together; but when we started, we spoke our own thing without even acknowledging or asking or even responding to one another. We don't know whom we were speaking two, there were just two of us in the car.
But we were quite cool about it. Infact, I didn't even realise that such a thing had happened until two mins ago.


I pronounce things wrong too. And they loff at me. But i hear funnier ones. Spices for species was really funny. And Schindler's List was called Sikandar's list...super funny too.

Before going to office on the first day , my mother told me no matter what the profile of the person was, to address him/her as sir/madam. That's what I have been always taught, even in school. During open days at school, I sometimes also referred to my friends parents (excellent small talk makers, all of them) as Sirs and Madams. Just a habit.
So, the first day of work..."Sachin sir..."
"Arre, he he he...Sir nahin re..Call me Sachin"
Me: Okay Sir!
Buhh.


More on Sir
It is difficult to communicate with people who know only their mother tongue.
I ask them "Can I speak to Ramesh?"
He tells me "Ohhkay Sir"
Then there is a pause for some time
.
.
Hello.
.
.
I say "Ramesh, good morning"
The same guy is still on the line "Ohhkay Sir"
I say "Tell Ramesh. Phone. Me."
He says "Ohhkay Sir"
I ask "Message. Dont Forget. Your name?"
He says "Ohhkay Sir"
I hang up.
He calls me back "Sirr..Ramesh, Lunch. Ohkay?"
Ohhkay Sir.

More on Phones
"Hello, good morning, <> "
Good morning. Can I speak to Mr. Jo Bhi please?
"Ok hold haan"
Ohhkay Ma'm.
I remember a friend of my advising me to say "What do you want me to hold on to baybei?",
in such situations.
Ting ting tingting ting TING TING TING TING ting..tingting ting ting ting tingtingting.

"Hello?you are still holding, no?"
Yes baby. Why not.

Ting ting tingting ting TING TING TING TING ting..tingting ting ting ting tingtingting.

"Jo Bhi has not come today"
WHY..YOU LILLULL!
D'OH!



Then?
Coffee for me and beer for the lady.
Some spectacle that was.

Then?
then..we continue to live, shit happens and then we die.